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 I'm not a fan of the highly romanticized vampire movies but this film makes up for that with the unique concepts and intriguing storyline. The story follows Mariam played by Catherine Denavue an ancient Egyptian vampire and her dying lover John played by David Bowie. Sadly unlike her, all her "loves" have an expiration date and she doesn't. So she sets her sights on a Dr. Roberts played by Susan Surandon, a doctor studying the disease of aging as a new companion.

  The film is a beautiful , though what else would you expect from Tony Scott? The use of neon is lights is very reminiscent of Argento's Suspira. Adding more af a variety to the blue tone used through out the entire film. The film's version of vampires are very real. How they live, act and find companions. The only traditional lore kept in the film is the concept of blood drinking, immortality and in-human strength. John is seen walking in the daylight, no stakes are present or fangs. Though this gives a romantic view of vampires you do not in any way envy these creatures. Except for when you see the romantic scenes with Bowie (maybe that was just me). The make up affects in the film are also very well done. I was very impressed with the aging makeup used on David Bowie considering this is a film made in 1983. It moved naturally and I even thought at one point another actor was playing the role of John. 

  Catherine Deneuve plays Marium in a way that its really up to th viewer to decide if she is the villain or some poor cursed women that just needs a companion. Honestly I hated Marium for just going around and replacing her lover's as easily we replace Apple products after a year. I adored Bowie's character John and really felt for him even though his screen time was limited. He has some very heart breaking scenes and it was hard to see him go since truly loved Marium and she just tossed away in her attic with the others. Sarandon also plays a tragic character but I cannot really go into details without including spoilers.

This film is a must see. I have no idea why I passed it up for so long. The imagery is stunning and the character's have a lot of depth. Plus it has a great song by the Bauhaus in the beginning. 

  I'm not sure of this is considered a horror film. It is in the horror section and found under horror online so be it. Out of all the versions of The Hound of the Baskervilles this is my personal favorite. The film stars Peter Cushing as Sherlock Holmes and Christiopher Lee as Sir Henry. Now everyone knows when these two film gods share a screen expect nothing bu the best and that is what you get. The best. If you dont know thos story already you should.  In a nut shell Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson have been asked to help in the solving of a mysterious murder believed to be caused by the infamous family Hell hound curse. What do you mean your family doesn't have a Hell Hound curse? 

   The film is very well done and a enjoyable watch. The work of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's work does very well with the Hammer treatment. Though in my eyes Classic Hammer horror can do no wrong. Sorry if this review seems biased at all. The sets are beautifully done, of course Hammer seems to have no problem getting access to beautiful castles and lush landscapes for filming. The film does change somethings around from the book but I complain about that enough. The costumes are also beautifully done as looked to be as they were plucked out of the books. The hound however is a great dane in a mask and its some what laughable. Oh well cant win them all.

This Sherlock Holmes film is how ever noted to have the most accurate portrayal of Watson. Thanks to the wonderful work of Andre Morell, who played Sextus in Ben Hur. Christopher Lee plays Sir Henry and does an excellent job playing the overly confident skeptic. Of course we cannot forget Peter Cushing's excellent portrayal of Holmes. Cushing brings out the aloof cockiness that the character was known for. Plus he looks dead sexy in the old Inverness cape with a pipe hanging out of his mouth. I can honestly say that when reading the books this is the character I was imagining in my mind. An extremely intelligent, cocky ass hole. I still believe that the Holmes in the Frogware games is based on Cuching's performance.

 I give this movie a very high rating. If you are a fan of Hammer than you will love it as much as I do. If you aren't a Hammer film you will still love it. Its a wonderful watch and family friendly. So introduce your child to some good cinema before they start watching Micheal bay movies. 

I was pleasantly surprised by this movie seeing as I lost all faith in Hollywood a few years ago. I will not ramble about how far the film is from the award winning anime. The film is about a half-vampire vampire hunter who works for an organization called The Agency hunting demons. Sounds a bit over used. Saya is a few 100 years old and has spent a few lifetimes hunting down the "Demon" who killed her father. She is sent to pose as a high school student in a military town were people start to randomly get slaughtered. The movie is a fun watch, with hardly a dull moment. Gianna Jun does an excellent job as Saya and added a lot of depth to the character that was not present in the anime.  She is nothing but a cold killing machine but as you watch the film you learn that theres quite a bit to her. During this adventure she accompanied by Alice played by Allison Miller who basically just screams and looks scared through most of the film until the end when she grows a pair. Traditional western vampire lore is pretty much non exsistant in this film. The only commonality is that they drink blood and a few of them are pretty.
    The cinematography is absolutely beautiful and stays loyal to the Japanese horror genre. There are some pretty spectacular fight scenes. My personal favorite has to be when Saya and Alice is surrounded by about 40 vampires, Basically Saya kicks ass while tossing Alice around like a rag doll. 
   The film is overall a good action movie with some horror elements. Yes it has vampires, transformation scenes, bit of gore but I don't think anyone would find anything frightening about this movie. So I'm going to say it. The anime was much better.  Sorry this one was so short. Movies these days are pretty much all the same.

   This film was so far from the book you would have thought DelToro was "working" with Mignola again. I just got done reading the Dunwich Horror so this movie isn't going to get any mercy from me. At least the basic concept of the film was kept but the charcters are way off. I will list.
  • Wilbur Whateley in the film is a good looking, suave ladies man. WRONG!!! Wilbur had a "goatish" appearance and was insanely awkward because he was really only 10 years old. He was always called "Lavinnys Black Brat" He was heavily deformed and hid it under his heavy clothing. So he wasn't running around having sex with Sandra Dee.
  • His mother was a hot brunette that was institutionalized after giving birth. Again wrong. Lavinny was a crazed albino that lived and died in her father's home. She loved and adored her sons and cared for them dearly because she knew what great things they were to do.
  • Old man Wheatly is completely submissive and terrified of his grandsons. No! Old man Wheatly was running the show. He taught Wilbur everything he knew about the The Old Ones, Black Magic and was owner of all the books he assigned Wilbur to study. He was the dominant head of the family. Wilbur would have never thought to cross him.
  • Sandra Dee plays a sexy sacrifice to summon Yog Sothoth. There wasn't anything even close to this in the book. Lovecraft didn't really have any lead female protagonists at all.
  • I could keep going but my dorkness is showing too clearly already.
I honestly feel that I will treat this film very unfairly because it strays so far from a wonderful story. The film stars Dean Stockwell from Quantum Leap fame and the popular Sandra Dee. Stockwell does an excellent job portraying this "Hollywood version" of Wilbur. You always know there is something very off about him but you cannot put your finger on it. Sandra Dee is nothing but a pawn through the entire move she is completely loyal and entranced by Wilbur. Which is really wrong. I will ay the sets, Especially Wilbur's house are stunning. Love that house. Even though its also very far from the story. See I cant say anything nice about this film.

I Will say that the end when Wilbur is conducting the ritual is the most hilarious thing in film history. I could not take the scene seriously at all and couldn't stop laughing. You need to watch the movie to understand. 

In the end the movie wasn't bad just very inaccurate. Which is to be accepted. Damn Hollywood. We all know when it comes to Lovecraft, the lower the budget, the better. 

Yes I conduct all my rituals in corduroy.

30 Days of Horror Day 3 Grim Reaper

  ::Yawn::  This film was a snoozer. Basically a stripper gets hit by a car and is saved by a "Guardian Angel" disguised as a homeless meth addict. Unfortunately because she "cheated Death" one of Death's lackeys has locked her in an old asylum (with a few others in the same situation) so she can be hunted down by the Grim Reaper. The story is different, I'll give it that. They have this rule that if you stay in the light, Death cant harm you. Its mentioned a few times but never really used except for when two girls trying to get the power to work and fail. 

  I don't remember any of the characters names at all. See in film you are supposed to make people care about the characters so it kinda matters when they die. I didn't like any of the characters even the Reaper. I mean The Mummy. Im not kidding at one point you see the Reaper "naked" and its a damn mummy! The movie was just really disappointing. The reel you in with a cool cover and than bore you to tears.

  Burn, Witch, Burn is a old fashioned horror masterpiece. The film is about Norman played by Peter Wyngarade a sociology professor whose primary focus is to disprove the occult and superstition.  He discover's that his wife has been practicing witchcraft to protect him from "Dark Forces". Tansy played by Janet Blair is a quite eccentric (if that makes any sense) who has been practicing witchcraft and hiding all her amulets from her husband. There is a wonderfully well played scene where  Norman finds all his wife's occult goods and sprawls them all over the table for her to see. He scorns her for her ridiculous behavior and beliefs in he supernatural. She becomes hysterical as Norman tried to shake some sense into her, She agrees to allow Norman to burn all her toys but she warns him that she will not be responsible for the consequences. OF course the very next day all Hell breaks loose. The end is a bit predictable but still great. 

   Peter Wyngarade does a wonderful job being the scornful skeptic who is humiliated by his wifes beliefs. You believe his performance through the entire movie. Janet Blair also does an excellent job playing Tansy. There is a great scene where she is tearing apart the house looking for a small doll and trying to convince her husband she lost her shopping list. Classic.

  Burn, Witch, Burn is a classic and I strongly suggest the film for everybody. Its creepy, suspenseful and a good watch. Right now its on Netflix to stream. Enjoy.


30 Days of Horror. Day 1 Deranged (1974)

   A movie strongly based on the crimes of Ed Gein (called Ezra Cobb here) in the 1950s. Coincidently made in the same year as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, another movie based on the murderer. The film stars Roberts Blossom who is know for his role as Marley in Home Alone. Blossom does an excellent job depicting the character. He catches how affected Gein was by his mother's sheltering and abuse. Cosette Lee also does an amazing job as Ezera's mother. She even quotes Gein's mother directly in the film. If you watch the movie everything Lee says about women is exactly what Mrs. Gein told her sons.
     The movie is an excellent depiction of Ed Gein's(called Ezera Cobb) character and mentality. Though his motive is completely changed his motive. I'm a pretty big Gein buff, so some things in the film were very off and it bothered me. One, he digs up his mother and starts grave robbing to reconstruct her after she was dead for a year. Gein was actually unable to dig up his mother when he tried. The soil was much too stony for him the break through. Because we all know "The soil of a man's heart is stonier." In the movie he brings the corpses he digs up back as "friends" for his mother. Gein did not treat the corpses so gentle. They would be cut up, the skin used for apoulstry, lamp shades, skulls for bowls and other oddities. Basically Gein could have written, 1001 Uses for a Corpse. They however leave out Gein dressing in human skin to "be his mother" completely. The most barbaric thing he did they left out. Thats not how you sell moves in the 1970s. The story does depict the crimes chronologically accurate and where he found his victims. The movie shows him murdering three people he only killed two. The first murder had great comedic value.
  The gore effects are mediocre. The blood looks so horribly colorful and fake it belongs in Suspiria. The corpses are acceptable for the low budget.
    Overall as a movie I would recommend this film to someone who has read about Gein, to appreciate the film. The movie in my eyes is really nothing special. Its not something I will go out a buy or probably watch again. I was pretty disappointed in what was left out as far as the crimes and what they altered.

Writer's Block: Art imitating life

Which movie would you show to aliens to represent humans and human nature?
Inglorious Bastards. Think about it.

Writer's Block: Hit the road, Cupid

If you had the power, would you permanently eliminate Valentine's Day?

YES YES YES. Stupidest Holiday on the face of the damn Earth.Change it to National Comic Book Day. No free comic book day doesnt count. A day where everyone gets the day off and you spend it reading your old favs or educating your children on good literature like The Goon, Sandman and The Amazing Screw on Head.

Bye bye old friend

My Dell died the night before last so I have to do everything with my iPod. Ian is lining me his old laptop and I should be buying a new one in the beginning of February. The issue is that Ian is demanding that I buy one with an independent graphics card but that feature is running me into the thousands on a laptop and I get crap pay. Oh well maybe someone can install an indie graphics card I buy separately.

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